Can Fighting Solve Problems

Fighting is a common event when conflict happens but does it ever solve problems? Fighting solves problems if both parties agreed to honor the outcome of the fight. It can reduce future conflicts when the losers admit defeat. The problem with fighting is that both parties get hurt and there are better problem-solving techniques.

Firstly, we don't encourage fighting to resolve problems.

“First keep the peace within yourself, then you can also bring peace to others.” ~ Thomas à Kempis.  No one really like to be in conflict, but so often they get stuck in the battle and cannot get out.

Fighting can solve the problem of determining who is the stronger party and leader when needed to prevent the future conflicts.

What's the most important thing you have learned about war?

Since tyrants, bullies, and criminals will always be with us, the fight never ends. But that does not means fighting is the solution.

What are the steps to handling fights to solve problems?

There are four basic steps to handling fights

1. step in when possible,
2. stay calm,
3. make a time to talk; and
4. apply consequences fairly.

When possible, step in when needed to break a fight up before someone gets hurt. That would be the best time to solve problems by preventing a fight from hurting all parties. This typically involves getting stronger parties like enforcers that all parties respect. If not, a fight typically goes on until both parties fight out their conflicts.

What are the Strategies for Dealing with Conflict?

The best way is to see conflicts in innocent children. It's not uncommon for children to argue over a toy or become frustrated when they are told “no.” Fighting and aggression whether it's in the form of name-calling, pushing, hitting, or refusing to share are common responses when children lack problem-solving skills.

People have to learn some alternative strategies like ways to talk about problems and create solutions.

Stay calm before the strong fight-or-flight emotion overtakes the brain's rational part used for problem-solving. Observing my own kid and she used emotional problem-solving skills every day like calling for help when they are thirsty or screaming when she wants to show her independence in drinking her own glass of water. These screaming are definitely similar to how adults will fight to solve problems.

What's the problem? Make a time to name the problem: “Grace is playing with the car and you want to take a turn.” Affirm your child's feelings and experiences: “It's frustrating when you both want to play with the same toy at the same time.” Problem-solve: “I can tell that you are very excited to take a turn with the car.

Even running was a viable strategy among the Thirty-Six Stratagems famous in Chinese culture. 

Is there a difference between fighting and running?

Running is always another option (fight or flight) and that depends on who, nobody wants to fight Dwayne Johnson or anyone else who would be a mismatch against yourself. Being calm under pressure and exhibiting self-control sets a positive example.

Over the years they collect resentments, holding on to them and firing them at the other when the conflict rages.

What are the consequences?

There are different consequences for the losers and winners of a fight.

• One consequence of fighting is it will discourage fighting for the loser typically. If you lose the fight, it is an opportunity to learn skills for avoiding fights and solving problems.
• The winner achieved positive reinforcement to fight more as it helps to solve problems. This would led to future fighting for the winners

The key point is to ignore fighting and whether the problems are solved. Fighting solves the problem of determining who is stronger and can reduce future conflicts as people learned to cooperate and get along with others. 

Nevertheless, never commit violence as life are precious.

Explore other ways that a problem can be resolved and always set the ground rules of what can and can't be done to resolve an issue.

Make sure everyone is settled and agreed to the outcome of a fight without insulting or making fun of each other. If you still haven't solved your differences, leave the subject and talk about something else.

What is the difference between hitting and supporting?

When you arguing so much with someone on a subject, someone of you will make the first hit. This is because you or he can not stand listening to the other telling wrong things(in your or his opinion). That will give you or him an incentive to hit the other too and at the same time, you or he support his idea. In the end, both of you leave wounded, angry, and without having your differences solved.